Prose And Poetry

Let me close some doors Let me close some doors, not because of pride or arrogance, but because there's no way through them anymore. But why? Why am I closing them? What led me to do this? There's a reason for it, just how there's a reason behind everything. It could be something someone did. It could be an emotion, a feeling that led to this specific doing. Something mentally damaging, something.....irreversible. Let me close some doors so that I won't have to go through the same thing again. Let me close some doors so that I won't end up with a broken heart anymore. Let me close some doors so that I won't have to go through this seemingly long neverending hallway of darkness, pain, and regret.  Let me close some doors, not because of pride or arrogance, but because there's no way through them anymore.

What would happen if I were to disappear?  Just like that. By whatever reason. How many people would get affected by it? Would anyone.... grieve? Would anyone miss me? How would people react?  How many people will go to my funeral? What if my time came, to leave behind everything and everyone I love. Death comes like a thief at night. Unexpected, taking you by surprise. Or you invite it in and you say to it, "Take me away already. Why continue? I have nothing anymore. No reason, no purpose." It's hard not to think about it. It just comes out of nowhere. Just a thought. Or sometimes someone says something that really puts that thought into process, sometimes, it could be your own family. It can be hard, to express that thought to other people, thinking that they might be able to help you. Sometimes they'll help you, but other times they'll just criticize you. When that happens you start to think, "Is there something wrong with me?" "...

Mistakes happen all the time. They can teach us something or they can really make us regret something we did. But when I make a mistake, don't come to me and shove it in my face saying it was all my fault. I know what I did and I'm not proud of it. But please, don't come repeating it to me like it'll do any good at all, because it won't. The only thing it'll do is reopen the wound that was already starting to heal. IT HURTS!! But, there's a limit on how many times you can reopen a wound. There's a point where those nerves around the wound begin to die, those feelings, then you begin to feel nothing at all, and it doesn't hurt you anymore. That's how you get a stone, cold-hearted person. The scar is there, but it's ugly because of how many people have messed with it. Don't be one of those people that "forgive's"  but doesn't forget.

When I ask you to listen, and you start to give me advice, you have not done what I asked. When I ask you to listen to me, and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings. When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problems, you have failed me, strange as that may seem. LISTEN! All I asked was that you listen, not talk or do, just listen. And I can do for myself. I'm not helpless, maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless. Please just listen. Don't make matters worse for trying to make things the right way, your way, and only making me feel worse than what I was before. Why do you think you have to correct me every time you feel the need to do so? Why do you feel the need to consult me every time I say something you think is irrational when all I'm trying to do is tell you my emotions? I would rather be the hard-stoned, cold-hearted person you think I am than to speak with...