Prose And Poetry

Turn out the lights. Close your eyes. Turn up the silence, the heartache of your life. Dance forever, under the lights, This Brutal Love. Oh how you want it, You're begging for it, But you can't have it even if you try. It's in the clutches, in the hands of This Brutal Love. Old toys, this plastic heart. Loners and fools are tearing me apart. Here comes trouble, the uninvited, This Brutal Love. Danger, not quite at home. The eyes of temptation, the flesh on my bones. Hello stranger, I'm a disaster, This Brutal Love. Bad luck, pities, and soda, anguish, and shame; the modern fool. Bad sex, buy me a trainwreck, something for my troubled mind. Bad luck, pities, and soda, anguish, and shame; the modern fool. Bad love, kiss me I'm roaded, something for my troubled mind. Drop out, drop dead hideous. How low is this Brutal Love? (4x) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84VP50arSL8

Give me anesthesia. Give me anesthesia so I won't have to feel the pain. Put me to sleep peacefully so my brain won't have to go through this again. Oh my heart, my aching little heart, open it up to relieve the pressure, the pressure of having to be this person who feels he has to fit to everybody's wants. It won't take much longer for it to explode, for it to be shattered and empty. It can't take much longer. Give me anesthesia to put me to sleep, not for a while, but for forever. Give me anesthesia so people won't have to look me in the eye and say "I told you so." Give me anesthesia and put me to sleep so that nobody else has to deal with another failure.

A scar without a knife is just a scratch, just nothing. It's not something that can just..... disappear. No. A scar is much worse than just a scratch. A scar hurts.  A scar leaves a mark for life. A scar is a reminder of the pain you've endured. A reminder of the tough times you've gone through. But, what's the knife? Could it have been a person? Maybe. It's not like it matters. The damage has been done already.

It's a deep dark pit of self-blame, self- hatred, and loneliness, and so many other things I cannot write on this paper. You feel like you're nothing like you're there and the next minute you're not, like dust carried by the wind because that's what we all are. You wish someone would come from the outside, someone who's on the top and tell you that it's all ok and that there's nothing to fear. You feel really separated from the rest of the world, abandoned or unappreciated and just left alone to rot in a hole. Can love fill that void? Can it make you forget all the bad things that you've gone through? Well, it can. If you can make the love last, you can. Sometimes, we spend so much time looking for our half, our love, that we may not even realize that they could be right under our noses or we may die never being able to fill that void in our hearts. If you found love, if you found your half of your heart, enjoy every single little moment ...